Welcome to Monday Morning Motivation!
This is a feature where I will be sharing quotes from books and poetry that have motivated and encouraged me in one way or another.
I hope you will find some of these quotes inspiring and uplifting.
This week, I’ll be sharing quotes from a book I just finished reading shortly titled ‘Safe People’ by Henry Cloud & John Townsend. This is a very important book to read and I highly recommend it. A lot of us keep stringing unsafe people along for many reasons and this book shows us our patterns in black and white, helping us to make better choices with our relationships. I hope you read it soon too. I would be sharing some quotes from this book with you and I hope it gets you thinking and shifting your mind in the right direction.
I wish you a fabulous week ahead!
“If you are uneasy about a relationship, ask yourself, Does this relationship breed more togetherness or more isolation within me? If you feel alone in the relationship, that’s not a good sign. But remem-ber: the first person to look at is yourself.”― Henry Cloud, Safe People: How To Find Relationships That Are Good For You And Avoid Those That Aren’t
“Defensive devaluation is a protective device that makes love bad, trust unimportant and people “no darn good any way”. People who have been deeply hurt in their relationships will often devalue love so it doesn’t hurt so much. And they often become resigned to never loving again.” ― Henry Cloud, Safe People: How To Find Relationships That Are Good For You And Avoid Those That Aren’t
“We need to use both reason and emotion in our choosing of people. We get into danger when we ignore our reason, when we find our hearts are attracted to people that our heads “know better” than to choose. At those times, we find ourselves picking people who cannot satisfy our needs and whose character does not measure up to our essential values. Our hearts become disconnected from our values and in conflict with our true needs. Because our hearts have been programmed to seek some sort of sickness inside, we find relationships that match the sickness inside our hearts.” ― Henry Cloud, Safe People: How To Find Relationships That Are Good For You And Avoid Those That Aren’t
“That’s why time-friendly people tend to make fewer emotional commitments than my friend Bernard does. They have a profound understanding of how much time it takes to be there for someone, so they think, deliberate, and pray long and hard before they decide to invest in a relationship. You might think they’re aloof or uncaring. They’re not. They are, instead, unwilling to write bad checks, emotionally speaking. Another friend, Pamela, recently passed the time test with flying colors. We’ve known each other a long time, and I needed her input on a big decision I was making. I knew she was busy, but I called her anyway, asking, “Can we do lunch?” Pamela lives quite a drive away, but she checked her calendar (another trait of safe people!), and we made an appointment. A few days later, we met, and I told her how much it meant to me for her to take the time out for me. She was genuinely surprised. “Well, I told you I’d be here, didn’t I?” Tears came to my eyes. For Pamela, a relationship means that you’re there for good. End of conversation. Look for people who are “anchored” over time. Don’t go for flashy, intense, addictive types. A Ford that will be there tomorrow is a lot better than a Maserati that might be gone. There are stable Maseratis. But it’s best to drive them awhile, that is, test out the relationship over time, to make sure.” ― Henry Cloud, Safe People: How To Find Relationships That Are Good For You And Avoid Those That Aren’t
“You know you’re around a safe, adult person by the following characteristics: She is not threatened by your differences. She has standards, values, and convictions she’s worked out for herself. At the same time, she doesn’t have a “right way” and a “wrong way” for everything. She functions at least on the same level of maturity as her same-age peers. She appreciates mystery and the unknown. She encourages me to develop my own values.” ― Henry Cloud, Safe People: How To Find Relationships That Are Good For You And Avoid Those That Aren’t
“Look for people who are “anchored” over time. Don’t go for flashy, intense, addictive types. A Ford that will be there tomorrow is a lot better than a Maserati that might be gone. There are stable Maseratis. But it’s best to drive them awhile, that is, test out the relationship over time, to make sure.” ― Henry Cloud, Safe People: How To Find Relationships That Are Good For You And Avoid Those That Aren’t
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