Welcome to Monday Morning Motivation!
This is a feature where I will be sharing quotes from books and poetry that have motivated and encouraged me in one way or another.
I hope you will find some of these quotes inspiring and uplifting.
This week, I’ll be sharing quotes from a book I just recently read titled ‘What Happened To You?’ by Dr. Bruce D. Perry & Oprah Winfrey. I would be sharing some quotes from this book with you and I hope it adds value to your journey and inspires you to be a better version of yourself. I highly recommend.
I wish you a great week ahead!
“Because what I know for sure, is that everything that has happened to you, was also happening for you, and all that time, in all of those moments, you were building strength. Strength times strength times strength equals power. What happened to you can be your power.” – Bruce D. Perry; Oprah Winfrey, ‘What Happened To You?: Conversations on Trauma, Resilience and Healing’.
“Forgive yourself. Forgive them. Step out of your history and into the path of your future. My friend, the poet Mark Nepo says that the pain was necessary in order to know the truth. But we don’t have to keep the pain alive in order to keep the truth alive. I made peace with my mother when I stopped comparing her to the mother I wished I had, when I stopped clinging to what should or could have been and turned to what was and what could be. – Bruce D. Perry; Oprah Winfrey, ‘What Happened To You?: Conversations on Trauma, Resilience and Healing’.
“Forgiveness is giving up the hope that the past could have been any different, but we cannot move forward if we’re still holding onto the pain of that past and wishing it was something else. All of us who have been broken and scarred by trauma have the chance to turn those experiences into what Dr Perry and I have been talking about: Post Traumatic Wisdom. – Bruce D. Perry; Oprah Winfrey, ‘What Happened To You?: Conversations on Trauma, Resilience and Healing’.
“Your connectedness to other people is so key to buffering any current stressor—and to healing from past trauma. Being with people who are present, supportive, and nurturing. Belonging.” – Bruce D. Perry; Oprah Winfrey, ‘What Happened To You?: Conversations on Trauma, Resilience and Healing’.
“stress is not something to be afraid of or avoided. It is the controllability, pattern, and intensity of stress that can cause problems.” – Bruce D. Perry; Oprah Winfrey, ‘What Happened To You?: Conversations on Trauma, Resilience and Healing’.
“the most powerful form of reward is relational. Positive interactions with people are rewarding and regulating. Without connection to people who care for you, spend time with you, and support you, it is almost impossible to step away from any form of unhealthy reward and regulation.” – Bruce D. Perry; Oprah Winfrey, ‘What Happened To You?: Conversations on Trauma, Resilience and Healing’.
“We need to understand that victims of trauma are more prone to all forms of addiction because their baseline of stress is different.” — Bruce D. Perry; Oprah Winfrey, ‘What Happened To You?: Conversations on Trauma, Resilience and Healing’.
“Marginalized peoples—excluded, minimized, shamed—are traumatized peoples, because as we’ve discussed, humans are fundamentally relational creatures. To be excluded or dehumanized in an organization, community, or society you are part of results in prolonged, uncontrollable stress that is sensitizing (see Figure 3). Marginalization is a fundamental trauma. This is why I believe that a truly trauma-informed system is an anti-racist system. The destructive effects of racial marginalizing are pervasive and severe.” – Bruce D. Perry; Oprah Winfrey, ‘What Happened To You?: Conversations on Trauma, Resilience and Healing’.
“What I’ve learned from talking to so many victims of traumatic events, abuse, or neglect is that after absorbing these painful experiences, the child begins to ache. A deep longing to feel needed, validated, and valued begins to take hold. As these children grow, they lack the ability to set a standard for what they deserve. And if that lack is not addressed, what often follows is a complicated, frustrating pattern of self-sabotage, violence, promiscuity, or addiction.” – – Bruce D. Perry; Oprah Winfrey, ‘What Happened To You?: Conversations on Trauma, Resilience and Healing’.
“It’s interesting-most people think about therapy as something that involves going in and undoing what’s happened. But whatever your past experiences created in your brain, the associations exist and you can’t just delete them. You can’t get rid of the past.
Therapy is more about building new associations, making new, healthier default pathways. It is almost as if therapy is taking your two-lane dirt road and building a four-lane freeway alongside it. The old road stays, but you don’t use it much anymore. Therapy is building a better alternative, a new default. And that takes repetition, and time, honestly, it works best if someone understands how the brain changes. This is why understanding how trauma impacts our health is essential for everyone.” – – Bruce D. Perry; Oprah Winfrey, ‘What Happened To You?: Conversations on Trauma, Resilience and Healing’.
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